Crossroads are scary places. Nothing is sure, and a wrong turn could take you miles from your intended destination. Three quotes come to mind.
“Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere.” Researched, methodical thinking is the key to making any decision a pleasant experience.
“The bend in the road is not the end of the road unless you refuse to take the turn.” Life doesn’t make sense very often. Things happen that are out of our control. We have trials as well as tender mercies that find themselves on our doorsteps. Take the turn…dead ends are never fun.
“Even if you are on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.” When a problem comes along, you must whip it…into shape…shape it up…get straight…go forward…move ahead…it’s not too late to whip it…whip it good.
Trust in your own intuition and divine intervention. As I find myself at my own crossroads, I have decided that these new kinds of experiences and “grown up” decisions are a new kind of adventure for me. It may not be traveling or school-related, but it’s an endeavor on its own terms. It’s like a choose-your-own-adventure novel. Crossroads are dangerous but necessary…just make sure you look both ways before you cross the street.
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
Your Whole Heart
Of the many things I learned in New Zealand, one of the most poignant lessons taught me about experiencing things whole-heartedly. I have seen the value in this lesson every day as I watch rushed parents dropping their children off at school, impatient drivers who try to shave seconds off their commutes by causing dangerous situations, and teenagers who wish their lives away to spend those important few hours with "friends." It's not only the fun or the stress-free moments that count. It's every moment.
If you are going to do something…anything at all…do it with your whole heart. When you drop your child off at school, leave him with your love and the reassuring words that you will be there when he gets home. When you offer to give someone a ride, do it with love and enthusiasm, not as if they're inconveniencing you in your ever-busy day. When you go to the grocery store, make the list and plan ahead. Your parents have dragged you along to another boring family excursion? Enjoy this time with your parents. Goodness knows they love you and crave this time spent together. I'm sure you will surprise yourself and look back with fond memories when they are no longer around.
There are good things that come from some of the most boring events. Funerals: the appreciation for your life. Work: money. Commute: time to finish that book on tape or listen to the top 20 songs or get high off the car fumes in front of you. Missed the bus: move those legs. So often the most important moments in life are run over by the trivial ones. Our lives start to be lived in passing. Each day really is just as important as the last. Today may not be Friday, but it consists of exactly the same amount of time as every other 24-hour period. So often we get stuck in a routine…a routine that begins to take over our lives. Generally, a routine is a blessing and we can still find ways to continue to find joy in the journey.
Not only do we sometimes not revel in the good times, but we spend so much time focusing on the bad that we start to diminish the good. It's like something I learned in my Health Class for Elementary Teachers. It's about recognizing the difference between the problem and the reality in a situation. Lexi dropped a glass platter full of freshly baked cookies for a party onto the floor. The glass shatters and the dog immediately gobbles up the cookies. What is the problem here? WRONG! The problem is not that Lexi dropped the glass platter onto the floor. That is the reality. No matter how much you complain or yell or stomp your feet, that platter is still broken and there are no more cookies. The problem is that there are no cookies to take to the party and that someone could step on the broken glass. Solution? Sweep up the broken glass and buy cookies for the party. Did wasting any of your precious energy to yell help the situation even one tiny bit? Nope. Calm down and address the real problem.
When your whole heart's in, the stakes are higher, you fall farther and could potentially have your whole heart broken at once. But it's worth it. It's worth it to feel the rush, the intensity of knowing that at this very moment you are putting your body and soul into something. Your everything. Whether it's driving to work, eating lunch, waiting at the doctor's office, or searching for a parking spot in a busy city, be there in that moment. Late for an appointment? Sorry, should have left earlier. Nothing you can do now, so just calm down.
In the middle of my seemingly never-ending job search, I came across this quote. "A man who wants something will find a way. A man who doesn't will find an excuse." What do we really want? Cross those top three that you just named off the list because you don't need money/objects to make you happy. You need people. Friends. Family. Laughter. Purpose. Find a way to have what you really want, and that doesn't cost any money at all. The best things in life are free. I don't want an excuse. I want you--your smile, your laughter, your company. You. Here with me. In this moment.
The point is…stop rushing through life. Time will take care of that for you. I feel like one day I'm going to wake up and be old. Figure out what is important to you and savor it. With your whole heart.
In this moment…I was probably not thinking. But I was there, and I felt the rush.
If you are going to do something…anything at all…do it with your whole heart. When you drop your child off at school, leave him with your love and the reassuring words that you will be there when he gets home. When you offer to give someone a ride, do it with love and enthusiasm, not as if they're inconveniencing you in your ever-busy day. When you go to the grocery store, make the list and plan ahead. Your parents have dragged you along to another boring family excursion? Enjoy this time with your parents. Goodness knows they love you and crave this time spent together. I'm sure you will surprise yourself and look back with fond memories when they are no longer around.
There are good things that come from some of the most boring events. Funerals: the appreciation for your life. Work: money. Commute: time to finish that book on tape or listen to the top 20 songs or get high off the car fumes in front of you. Missed the bus: move those legs. So often the most important moments in life are run over by the trivial ones. Our lives start to be lived in passing. Each day really is just as important as the last. Today may not be Friday, but it consists of exactly the same amount of time as every other 24-hour period. So often we get stuck in a routine…a routine that begins to take over our lives. Generally, a routine is a blessing and we can still find ways to continue to find joy in the journey.
Not only do we sometimes not revel in the good times, but we spend so much time focusing on the bad that we start to diminish the good. It's like something I learned in my Health Class for Elementary Teachers. It's about recognizing the difference between the problem and the reality in a situation. Lexi dropped a glass platter full of freshly baked cookies for a party onto the floor. The glass shatters and the dog immediately gobbles up the cookies. What is the problem here? WRONG! The problem is not that Lexi dropped the glass platter onto the floor. That is the reality. No matter how much you complain or yell or stomp your feet, that platter is still broken and there are no more cookies. The problem is that there are no cookies to take to the party and that someone could step on the broken glass. Solution? Sweep up the broken glass and buy cookies for the party. Did wasting any of your precious energy to yell help the situation even one tiny bit? Nope. Calm down and address the real problem.
When your whole heart's in, the stakes are higher, you fall farther and could potentially have your whole heart broken at once. But it's worth it. It's worth it to feel the rush, the intensity of knowing that at this very moment you are putting your body and soul into something. Your everything. Whether it's driving to work, eating lunch, waiting at the doctor's office, or searching for a parking spot in a busy city, be there in that moment. Late for an appointment? Sorry, should have left earlier. Nothing you can do now, so just calm down.
In the middle of my seemingly never-ending job search, I came across this quote. "A man who wants something will find a way. A man who doesn't will find an excuse." What do we really want? Cross those top three that you just named off the list because you don't need money/objects to make you happy. You need people. Friends. Family. Laughter. Purpose. Find a way to have what you really want, and that doesn't cost any money at all. The best things in life are free. I don't want an excuse. I want you--your smile, your laughter, your company. You. Here with me. In this moment.
The point is…stop rushing through life. Time will take care of that for you. I feel like one day I'm going to wake up and be old. Figure out what is important to you and savor it. With your whole heart.
In this moment…I was probably not thinking. But I was there, and I felt the rush.
Wednesday, July 2, 2008
Take Time to Realize
Sometimes life starts to feel like a never-ending barrage of this and that and sorry and whoops and no. Sometimes things go smoothly and sometimes it feels like we are hitting every red light along the road.
One thing that I have realized recently, is that my life is today. My life is not tomorrow and my life is not yesterday. The things of yesterday have gone away and they provide great memories…but those days are never to return again. Tomorrow gives hope and opportunity but looking too much towards tomorrow robs me of today. My life. Today.
Tomorrow I have a job interview and yesterday I reconnected with a friend. Today. What am I doing right now? Am I happy? Do I have a good attitude? How do the people feel who are around me? This is what matters. Because tomorrows come and yesterdays are left behind but our precious present is the path on which we walk right now.
Eminem says it here:
If you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted…one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?
Right now is your one shot. Don’t let it pass you by.
One thing that I have realized recently, is that my life is today. My life is not tomorrow and my life is not yesterday. The things of yesterday have gone away and they provide great memories…but those days are never to return again. Tomorrow gives hope and opportunity but looking too much towards tomorrow robs me of today. My life. Today.
Tomorrow I have a job interview and yesterday I reconnected with a friend. Today. What am I doing right now? Am I happy? Do I have a good attitude? How do the people feel who are around me? This is what matters. Because tomorrows come and yesterdays are left behind but our precious present is the path on which we walk right now.
Eminem says it here:
If you had one shot, one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted…one moment
Would you capture it or just let it slip?
Right now is your one shot. Don’t let it pass you by.
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